Dude calls me last night, talking about some “Oh, by the way. One of the credit card companies [you know, the credit cards that I used for online porn and 'adult' dating sites where I tried to find ppl to cheat on you with, and went out drinking with, and lived a completely separate and secret life courtesy of] has put a lein against my taxes. And since I signed you up for a card [you know, one of those plastic things I never let you use?] so all of this is already going on your credit, and the lein will also apply to any taxes you get back. But don’t worry, because if [IF!] I keep up with the payment plan, I will only owe a couple hundred by the end of April. So after that you’ll be good to go.”
Uh, yeah. Captain Subtext fills in the rest of the story: “Nevermind that the end of April is already past the cut-off date for filing your taxes. Nevermind that you’re a single mom who needs her refund already in January. Nevermind that I’m way in arrears with child support already, so you’re all-the-more desperate for cash. Oh, also nevermind that this week’s money never came, or that, while I knew this week’s money was not coming, I played like everything was okay and even sweated some money out of you for a bill. Nevermind too, that I’ve pulled money from somewhere and am, as we speak, on my way out of town for the night [and now as I write this, a supposedly-unexpected 2nd night], knowing that it was my weekend to have the kids — nevermind that I’m not going to even make mention of that! Nevermind all those many ways I’ve screwed you over the years, and continue to screw you. I just want to make sure you know that I haven’t forgotten, and I still care. I’m working hard to find new ways to screw you, and then make it look like I’m giving my all to restoring this relationship and you’re a crazy bitch for not playing along and believing in me.”
And that’s reason #697 that I can’t wait to finally get the divorce over and done with this year.
